Master List
Hankyung & Heechul
A master list to browse through my fics!!

[One Shots]

Mashisoyo Heechul
Pairing: Hanchul | Rating: PG | Genre: Comedy/Crack
Is it a simple mispronunciation, or something much more literal than that? 

Furniture Shopping
Pairing: Hanchul | Rating: PG | Genre: Comedy/Crack
Furniture Shopping trips would be so much better if it involved a big, strong bed and a very naked Hankyung

Beijing Fried Rice should not be shared
Characters/Pairing: Hanchul, Innocent Donghae and Kyuhyun | Rating: G | Genre: Comedy/Crack
Beijing Fried Rice was never meant to be shared i

You're Mine
Characters/Pairing: Main!SiHanchul, Kyumin, Kangteuk, Eunhae, Henry, Jungmo (TRAX) | Rating: PG for language | Genre: Angst, Romance
"And you deserve him, hyung. Even though you are a coward and are afraid of your own feelings. Even though he doesn't love you!"

Just Kiss Him Senseless
Pairing: Hanchul, Kihae | Rating: PG-13 | Genre: Comedy/Crack
Heechul finds it maddeningly annoying when Donghae and Kibum take turns to hug Hankyung. Especially more so since Hankyung is in the midst of making Beijing Fried Rice for him. But his anger hits the peak when Donghae and Kibum takes turns to kiss Hankyung...

The Bet: Sexy Dancing Hankyung
Pairing: Hanchul, some BoomTeuk, as well as our Eunhyukkie | Rating: PG | Genre: Comedy/Crack
A/N: Sorry... had to change this to a one-shot... *runs away*

Pairing: Kangteuk, Eunhae | Rating: PG-13 | Genre: Smut, Comedy/Crack
Their innocence deserves questioning. 

Heenim's Little List
Pairing: Sihanchul | Rating: PG-13 | Genre: Romance
Heechul makes a list on who would be the better man for him

Valentines Day
Pairing: SiHanChul, Hyuksu, Others: Kyuhyun/Zhoumi, Sungmin/Almost everyone, Yunjae, Jaemin, Kangteuk | Rating: PG-13 | Genre: School!AU, Romance, Humour, Fluff
It's Valentines Day, and hopes are flying high among the students, what with the newest trending confession style to be a red rose anonymously delivered to your crush's locker... Which was what Hankyung fully intended to do to his life-long crush - none other then Kim Heechul.
Thanks to vanilachocopie for the idea!

22 Steps to Get Your Man
Pairing: None - Implied Hanchul | Rating: PG-13 | Genre: School!AU, Romance, Humour
Heechul writes down 22 surefire steps that would successfully help you get your man
Wrote this with bananallama26 ~

Hankyung's Science Report
Paring: Hanchul | Rating: PG-13 | Genre: School!AU, Humour
Hankyung observes his subject and records down information on which songs are best suited for subject to be able to sleep well at night

Labor Pangs
Pairings: Hanchul, HaeHyuk | Rating: PG-13 | Genre: Comedy/Crack, mpreg
Heechul goes into labor with a not-very-helpful husband and a weird doctor with his three tapping fingers...

In a world of precious gems
Characters: Heechul, Kangin, Kibum | Rating: PG | Genre: Adventure, Humor
Kibum's always had an eye out for shiny, expensive objects, and had a tendency to fight to his death for it, regardless if the object in question was buried deep within a mountain or being eaten by huge, red beasts twice his size.

The Matter of Fanfiction
Characters/Pairings: Hanchul, and Super Junior | Rating: R for the fanfic in the fanfic | Genre: Comedy, Humor
Hankyung chances upon Heechul's open laptop and finds a fanfiction website opened on the screen, about him and Heechul, no less. Amidst awkward confrontations and busybody members questions arise, like: Why can't I ever top? (Heechul), Why does this only happen to me? (Hankyung), and Why does everyone think we're gay? (both)

[Two Shots]

Donghae the Wish Fairy:
[Part 1] [Part 2]
Pairing: Main!Donghae, Kihae, SiHanchul, Kangteuk, Kyumin, Yewook  Rating: PG-13  Genre: Comedy/Crack
Donghae discovered that he can grant wishes, and the whole Super Junior dorm is turned upside down with this newfound ability.

Bearing Grudges
[Part 1] [Part 2]
Characters/Pairing: Kyuhyun, Hanchul, Eunhyuk, Leeteuk
Kyuhyun, like the other members, get hurt when bad things happen. Kyuhyun, like the other members, remembers the event. But Kyuhyun, unlike the other members, does not accept them. Kyuhyun, unlike the other members, does not forgive them.


The Source of My Milk
Pairing: Yoosu | Rating: PG-13 | Genre: Romance, comedy, fluff
Yoochun orders some milk from his curvaceous neighbor, Jun-chan, but where, exactly, did those milk come from?

Bits and Pieces of Super Junior

Pairing: All | Rating: G | Genre: General
I'll try an update daily... :)

Super Junior/DBSK Drabbles
Genre: General, Humour
Five Super Junior/DBSK drabbles :D

Diamond Dust Couple Rings
Pairing: Hanchul  Rating: G  Genre: Comedy, Fluff
Couple rings for Hanchul?

That's Not Candy
Characters/Pairing: Mother!Teuk and Son!Donghae, minor Kangteuk | Rating: PG-13 | Genre: Comedy/Crack
Mother Teuk is in a shop with Donghae, who is extremely interested in the candies they have for sale; in particular a never-tried before, feather-like soft texture, strawberry flavored candy.

Pictures of Him in Your Locker
Pairing: Heechul/Sungmin, minor Hanchul and Kyumin | Rating: G  Genre: School!AU, Romance, Friendship
Sungmin walks by his best friend's locker and sees him staring at pictures of the newest, hottest dancer of their school taped onto his locker wall...

Thanks to static_abyss for telling me how to create a Master List. Though I'm kinda surprised that they let us change the dates... as to when we upload our blogs... that's just weird...
Hanchul forever! Comments are loved almost as much as Hanchul, and please message me to let me know of any broken links! 
Oh, and I'll accept good requests too!!

[Drabble] The Source of My Milk
Hankyung & Heechul
title: The Source of My Milk
pairing: Yoosu (female Junsu!)
genre: Romance, comedy, fluff
rating: PG-13
notes: A Yoosu drabble off the top of my head... :DD

  “What do you mean?”

  Yoochun pauses to stare at his neighbor. A pretty young woman with a sweet apple face, a pair of small cocky eyes, a sexy, curvy figure that made Yoochun drool, along with the biggest ass he’d ever seen, and the even bigger boobs he’d ever seen, in his life.

  A reply is not forthcoming from Yoochun since he is too busy staring at the enormities of his sexy but slightly dense neighbor, so she demands again, haughtier this time.

  “What do you mean my milk tastes weird?”

  Her eyebrows twitch upwards at that and it draws Yoochun’s attention back down to Earth – but she crosses her arms over her mighty chest and Yoochun’s attention shifts from what she was saying… to what she’s now cradling.

  “It’s just… I can’t really explain it.” Yoochun mumbles, as all he truly cares for right now are his neighbor’s three sizes (mainly the chest one), and not the milk he’d ordered from her farm, even if it did taste a little weird (he hadn’t been making up an excuse just to see his neighbor. Oh, no, of course he wouldn’t do that.).

  But who cares about milk, anyway?

  She frowned. “What do you mean?”

  The milk stored in those boobs, maybe.

  “It’s just…” Yoochun was running out of things to say. Amazing, seeing as how in their five minutes of conversation initiated by Yoochun on the problematic milk he had only formed two coherent sentences thus far, which shouldn’t be posing this challenge to him, considering that Yoochun is your average guy with his average intelligence and his average… needs. He is now struggling on his third sentence. Think, Yoochun, think. If he didn’t say anything soon then his neighbor would leave and if his neighbor left then her boobs would follow and then what would Yoochun stare at in the boredom and emptiness of his new rural farmhouse?

  “Is the milk really from a cow?” There, another sentence. Yoochun doesn’t really know what he’s saying but as long as its English and not Martian…

  Hmm, Mars. Yoochun wonders if the female aliens there had boobs of this size big. By now he’s pretty sure that his pretty neighbor is at the very least a pretty big G-cup.

  “W-W-What do you mean?!” Suddenly the arms fly away from their previous positions and the boobs jiggle from abruptly losing their arm support. Yoochun ogles. “Of course the milk came from my cow!!” His neighbor turns wary all of a sudden and starts to back out of his house, her arms crossed over her chest protectively.

  “W-Where…” She hesitates, and Yoochun swears all the money he has left in his bank account that those hands supposedly protecting the two mountains sticking out in front of her changed into a gripping pose. Yes. All of a sudden, his well-nourished perfectly developed neighbor seemed to be gripping her beautiful watermelons sent down from sweet heaven.

  Yoochun’s underwear suddenly feels a lot tighter and he unknowingly takes a step forward.

  “W-Where else could they possibly come from?!” She squeaks. Breasts in hands, ass swaying maddeningly, she flees from her pervert of a neighbor back to her own place where all is sweet and peaceful, with as much theatric effect as one of those sappy country-side love dramas that Yoochun never imagined himself to be a part of.

  Yoochun sighs and slides down onto the floor, in love.

[FIC] The Matter of Fanfiction
Hankyung & Heechul
title: The Matter of Fanfiction
characters/pairings: Hanchul, and Super Junior :D
genre: Comedy
rating: R - for the fanfic in the fanfic

  Hankyung blinked repeatedly and flushed. This was really…

  Why was Heechul reading this kind of stuff online??!!

  It’s not like they were plastered all over the Internet, you could actually avoid them if you went to… the correct websites. It’s not like the links to these kind of stuff was located in the comments posted by your fans on your blog, and even if it was, it’s not like you have to… click it.

  Or read it.

  Why does Heechul read this kind of stuff online?!!

  Why… oh wait, there’s another link.

  Click, click.

  Holy shit! Hankyung reeled backwards after reading the first paragraph of text on the screen. This is all sex!

  Oh shit shit shit shit shit. With shaking fingers, Hankyung minimized the webpage. Oh shit.

  Breathe Hankyung. Just… breathe.

  Why, oh why?? Why was Heechul reading this kind of stuff online??!!

  Hankyung shut his eyes. Reading it once was bad enough, but…

  Seemingly without his control, his fingers were moving against his sane will and were clicking the minimized webpage.

  The page blossomed in front of him. Hating himself, Hankyung continued reading from where he left off.

  “Han… kyung…” Heechul’s voice was low, sultry and delicious. “Please… oh god!”

  He was almost in tears now. “Hankyung, please…” Heechul whispered, mouthing a silent moan. “Please, Hankyung!” Hankyung’s heart went out to him as Heechul begged him softly, but still he didn’t relent. He caressed Heechul’s naked form lying beneath him, and his fingers teased gently. He tickled his fingers up and down Heechul’s thigh, feeling his orgasm building up within him, but he held it back- not yet, not now. He wanted Heechul on his knees, begging, crying, screaming his name, and then-

  That was as far Hankyung could read. He took a deep breath and minimized the page again. The words were still visible in his head… replaying itself over and over again.

  “I hate myself,” he muttered. He clicked the page again.

  He wanted Heechul on his knees, begging, crying, screaming his name, and then, and then the real fun will begin. He stroked Heechul’s beautiful face with his other hand, tracing his delicate jaw line. His tongue followed soon after, taking the same path as his finger, but this time it went lower then that. Hankyung licked him down to his bellybutton at a painfully slow rate, and Heechul cried out when he paused there. So close, and yet so far.

  “What’s wrong, Heechul?” Hankyung asked. “Don’t like it?”

  “I like it.” Heechul breathed, chest heaving. “I like it.” The tears came now, and Heechul shut his eyes, turning away. “Just fuck me, Hankyung!”

  Hankyung stopped and minimized the page again. He could feel his heart pounding wildly in his chest, thumping painfully hard.

  Why were these people doing, writing him… doing this… to Heechul?! Hankyung, was straight, thank you very much. Okay, so maybe his last break-up with his girlfriend was only one week ago and he was already over her, but that didn’t mean he was gay. It’s not like he broke up with her over Heechul, right?

  It’s not like his girlfriend saw him feeding Heechul ice-cream and then affectionately wiping his mouth and got jealous and went all ‘How come you don’t treat me like this, oppa?!’ and broke up with him, right?

  No. Hankyung’s shoulders slumped. That wasn’t even half of it.

  Apparently Hankyung’s girlfriend kept on catching him with Heechul doing things at the right timings. Like when Heechul’s knee was hurting and it was obvious that he was in pain but he just wouldn’t say it. Instead of listening to his friend’s reassurance that he was okay, Hankyung reached out and wrapped his arm around Heechul’s waist and gently supported him to a bench. He bent down and massaged Heechul’s knee the way he liked it, all the while whispering comforting things to his friend, doing his best to ease his pain.

  And then when Heechul bent his head down and cried because it just hurt too much, Hankyung sat beside him on the bench and pulled Heechul into his embrace, giving him a soft kiss on the forehead along the way.

  “It was just a peck,” Hankyung shouted, but she didn’t buy it.

  There was also once when he and Heechul were sitting on a park bench waiting for Kangin with a car to come pick them up, and Heechul fell asleep on his shoulder. Watching him sleeping so soundly like this, Hankyung’s eyelids drooped as well, as he fell asleep too.

  “We were just sleeping!” Hankyung cried, but he stopped shouting when she waved her camera at him. The picture showed Heechul’s head on Hankyung’s chest, his lips parted and pressed onto Hankyung as though in a half kiss. His arms were draped across Hankyung’s legs, and Hankyung’s arms were wrapped around Heechul, his head bent on top of Heechul’s head in an almost loving motion.

  It looked a photo that had been photo-shopped very well, and when Hankyung mentioned this she threw her camera at him and stormed out of the stunned café.

  That particular camera was resting on his shelf this very moment. Hankyung reached out for it, and went through its memory.

  Well. There was really an awful amount of pictures that looked like it had been photo-shopped.

  His blush came up again. He turned off the camera and put it at one side, and clicked the webpage again.

  Hankyung grinned. Not yet. A while more…

  He snaked his arm over Heechul’s belly and half-hugged him. He brought his face close to Heechul’s and blew on his eyelids. Heechul’s eyelids flutter and he shuddered. His other free arm snaked downwards and toyed with Heechul. A grin spread across his face and Heechul twitched and tossed, gasping.

  “Say it…” Hankyung muttered, feeling a warm electricity spread throughout his body. “Say it, Heechul.”

  “Fuck-“ Heechul gasped as Hankyung stuck his fingers in. “Fuck- me- Hankyung!” Heechul twisted himself and strained against the handcuffs that were holding him securely to the bedpost. Heechul tried to pull away, but the handcuffs were unwilling to let him go. More tears came now – in frustration.

  “Hankyung!!” he hissed. “Stop-the-vibrator-god!”

  Hankyung laughed, and cupped Heechul’s face tenderly. “Not yet,” he whispered, and he leaned forward and smashed their lips together.

  Hankyung breathed in sharply. Images were forming in his head. Images of him… doing that to…

  Oh god. Hankyung winced.

  Heechul tasted like dark chocolate and strawberries. He pulled Heechul’s head closer, and stopped for a while, examining the face of the beauty in front of him. Heechul gasped and rubbed his legs against Hankyung’s, licking his lips in a seductive way. He went in for yet another kiss – this one was powerful, breath-taking, and felt like heaven – and yet Hankyung could do more.

  “I can do more,” he said, grabbing Heechul’s head and laying kisses on every available skin. “I can do more.”

  “So DO IT!” Heechul screamed. He bucked and gasped and sent off fireworks in Hankyung’s heart. “Do-it-HANKYUNG!!”


  Hankyung jumped off the chair in shock.

  “Go and bathe, Hankyung!!” yelled Heechul. Thank goodness he wasn’t in the room. Hankyung gave himself ten seconds to ease his thumping heart and put Heechul’s laptop exactly as how he had left it. Then he grabbed his clothes and towel and barreled to the washroom.

  The walk to the washroom felt exceptionally long. He walked down the hallway, and disturbing images of the fanfics kept flashing in his head.

  Heechul naked, on his knees, begging for more…

  Heechul naked, teasing him, stroking his body, tickling him…

  Heechul naked, tearing off his clothes one by one…

  Heechul naked, mewling in bed, arching his body, leaving scratches all over him…

  Heechul naked, stepping out of the shower, sending shivers up his body…

  Hankyung threw the door open, and his mouth fell open. “Hee-Chul!” he gasped.

  “What?!” Heechul snapped back irritably.

  “I thought you were done…” Hankyung managed weakly.

  “I am done,” Heechul said, turning around to give Hankyung an odd look. “What’s wrong with you?”

  Hankyung swallowed as against his will, the image of the beautiful man standing in front of him registered in his brain – Heechul naked, stepping out of the shower. Hankyung could feel shivers up his body.

  He’s naked.

  Oh god.

  “I’ll be done soon.” Heechul turned his attention to the mirror, preparing to wash his face with facial wash. “You can go into the shower.” He pulled a bathrobe on and tied it loosely around his waist.

  “No, it’s okay hyung, I’ll wait…”

  Heechul stared at him in the mirror. Hankyung could see himself blushing. “You,” Heechul began in a low voice.

  Hankyung felt himself shrinking.

  “You called me hyung.”

  Hankyung resisted the urge to sigh in relief.

  “You don’t have to, you know.”

  Hankyung stares at the floor. The room felt uncomfortably hot.

  “And you can shower now, you know.”

  Especially his pants.

  There was pause and Hankyung contemplated on the idea of fleeing. No, too many questions. It wasn’t as though Hankyung had never showered in a room when another one of his members was in it. Like those times in China with Siwon. Or sometimes with Donghae. And Leeteuk, when Kangin wasn’t in the dorm.

  But this was Heechul. The Heechul, who makes out with him in fanfics. The Heechul, who is ready for sex anytime in the fanfics. The Heechul, who bottoms him when they’re having sex in the fanfics. The Heechul, who screams in frustration when a vibrator gets rammed up inside of him.

  In the fanfics, of course.

  “Look.” Heechul faced him once more. “I’m not going to barge into the shower when you’re bathing okay? I’m not going to peek either, if that makes you comfortable, okay?”

  Hankyung licked his lips and blushed, staring at the floor.

  “Though I don’t know what’s your problem.” Heechul grumbled. “You’ve done this before with Donghae, with Leeteuk, with-“ he pauses. “Siwon.”

  Hankyung’s cheeks got even redder. There were fanfics about him and Siwon, too.

  A lot of them.

  “Wait.” Heechul stuck a finger under Hankyung’s chin and tilted it up, forcing him to look into his eyes. “So Siwon can look at you while you’re bathing, Siwon can be in the same room as you when you’re bathing, but I cannot?”

  Hankyung tried to back away from Heechul, out into the hallway. Heechul was faster. He reached out and shut the door firmly.

  “What’s wrong with you?” Heechul demanded, moving even closer to Hankyung then they already were. “What’s the difference between me and Siwon? And why are you so red?”

  Heechul came so close that the tips of their noses were practically touching one another. As he did so, his bathrobe slid downwards, and the knot at the front undid itself.

  Hankyung meeped. Heechul frowned at him.

  Hankyung pressed himself back against the door. This couldn’t be happening…

  This was exactly as how the fan had written her fic. Heechul naked, stepping out from the shower, Hankyung catching him, Heechul cornering him, Hankyung turning red then white, then-

  No. There’s no then. This is real life, not fanfiction.

  Heechul pressed his hand to Hankyung’s forehead and Hankyung jumped like he’d just gotten electrocuted. Heechul’s hand was warm and soft and gentle. He tried to move away, but Heechul just slammed his hand, forcefully this time, to his head.

  “No fever…” he muttered. He stared at Hankyung, as though wondering what sort of illness Hankyung might be catching.

  Hankyung reached out and grabbed the doorknob. If he could just unlock the door and bolt out and away from Heechul... His heart was pounding a mile a minute. To be frank he was feeling a little afraid. He’d read that fic, alright. They’d ended up in bed. Hankyung wasn’t going to let that happen. He was straight.

  Although, judging by how things were going, this whole thing was one very big coincidence. That, as well as a lot of bad luck. If he wanted to stay straight, then he’d to push Heechul away… now.

  “Heechul…” he mumbled, and made the mistake of looking Heechul in the eye.

  “Heechul…” he mumbled, and made the mistake of looking Heechul in the eye. They were brown, deep, and full of concern. Something sparked inside of Hankyung. He held the gaze for five long second and could hold it no longer. Impulse made him grab Heechul forcefully and bring their lips together. 

  Hankyung’s throat dried up as images formed in his head. No.

  “I read fanfiction!” he blurted out, after they had held their gaze for five seconds.

  Heechul looked completely taken aback. “What?”

  “Fanfics,” said Hankyung. Inside he cursed himself for opening his mouth. “Fanfics about you and me.”

  “Oh?” Heechul raised an eyebrow in interest. “What were we doing in the fic?”

  Hankyung felt his blush returning. “Um,” he said intelligently. “We… we… do… well… you know…”

  Heechul watched him stammer for a few seconds before his eyes lit up with realization. “You were on my laptop?” he asked, turning a little red himself.

  “No! I mean, yes, but…”

  “No wonder you’re acting so weird. Which fic is it? What’s wrong with it? Why is it stopping you from showering?” Saying so, Heechul unlocked the door and before the other could stop him, dragged Hankyung with him to the bedroom.

  Heechul sat down on the bed and hit the keyboard on his laptop. The screen flickered on.

  “Which one is it?” Heechul demanded, clicking open a webpage. Hankyung didn’t even need to answer. His deep red blush was enough to answer Heechul’s question.

  “I can do more,” he said, grabbing Heechul’s head and laying kisses on every available skin. “I can do more.”

  “So DO IT!” Heechul screamed. He bucked and gasped and sent off fireworks in Hankyung’s heart. “Do-it-HANKYUNG!!”

  Hankyung turned crimson red and so did Heechul. He was embarrassed. Reading a fanfiction about him doing that to Heechul… With Heechul...  Well, somebody please save him.

  Heechul scrolled down.

  Hankyung smiled. He unbuckled his own pants and pulled them off. He kissed Heechul powerfully. Heechul gasped as finally – after an hour – the vibrator was removed. There was a clicking sound above their heads, and the handcuffs fell off to one side.

  Heechul moaned with pleasure as Hankyung replaced the vibrator with his own “Make me come.” Heechul’s voice tickled Hankyung’s ears like pleasant music.

  Hankyung moved away from Heechul. He hoped that Heechul didn’t believe anything that those fans had written about him. Hankyung wasn’t like that. He wasn’t so… aggressive in bed. He wasn’t so perverted and twisted, either.

  Make me come.

  “You always top in these fics, you know?” Heechul didn’t seem particularly disturbed by the passage that both of them had been reading.

  “You top practically everyone in every single pairing that has you in it. You top Siwon, Jaejoong, even Kangin…”

  Hankyung was speechless. Honestly, how could anyone respond to that?

  “Sometimes Siwon tops you, though. Jaejoong and Kangin too. But I never top.” Heechul frowned thoughtfully. “They write me making out with lots of people, Yunho, Donghae… but I’m always the uke.”

  “Why not?” Heechul continued, talking more to himself then to Hankyung. “Do I look like I prefer dominance over my body? They say that the uke controls the seme, like, top from the bottom, but I’m not so sure. Take this fic, for example. How can I possibly control you if you can chain me to beds and stick vibrators up me?”

  Hankyung scooted further back at the word ‘you’. Maybe he could slip out of the room without Heechul noticing…

  “What if I topped you?”

  Hankyung hoped that he wasn’t asking him. He was. Heechul turned around so that he could face Hankyung. “Would you like it if I topped you?”

  “Er. No?” he tried to stop his voice from shaking.

  “See? I don’t like it either when so many people keep on topping me. But what’s the difference between us? Is it because you have muscles?”

  “I… guess?”

  “I don’t have muscles, but I can swim faster then you. I’m more flexible then you, too. Why don’t the fans count that?”


  “And do you like dominance?” Heechul continued. “You don’t look like the aggressive kind. You’re sweet, more innocent then me. Well, at least you look sweet and innocent. Your personality is like an uke. And you’re younger, too. I’m like your opposite. I’m harsh, insolent, and I have a temper. I’m the hyung. My personality is fiercer then yours. I’m like a seme. But just because you have muscles, you get to top me.”

  Hankyung nodded, hoping that Heechul would finish his thought soon and let him bathe in the safety and privacy of the bathroom.

  “I don’t like this. Does this mean I have to get muscles to top? Besides, Hankyung do you even like dominance?”

  Hankyung felt his eyes go big and wide and round. “You’re… asking me?”

  “That, or I’m asking the air.” Heechul huffed impatiently. “Well, Hannie? The fanfics say that you top, but what would you really do in real life?”

  Hankyung had a feeling that if he didn’t answer, Heechul would suggest taking off all their clothes and have sex just to prove who would top who. He licked his lips nervously. “I think so.”


  “Well, it’s just a feeling I get.” Hankyung knew he wasn’t making much sense, but he had to keep talking. Anything to keep Heechul from suggesting that they try it out. “And I think I know why you always bottom.”

  “You do?”

  Nope. “Um, yes. It’s, uh, because of your feminine looks. You, don’t, um, you know, have a lot of muscles, and your body figure is really thin and nice. It’s, you know. Feminine. And not just your body figure. Your long black hair, your milky white skin. And, er, also, your hands. They’re really warm and soft and gentle. So you bottom because you, er, look very feminine.”

  Hankyung held his breath as Heechul considered what he’d just said. He lifted up his hands and stared at them. “Really?”

  “Yeah.” Hankyung knew that guys like Heechul and Jaejoong didn’t mind being called ‘pretty boys’, but they took offence if anyone compared them to females. He didn’t think that it would be very wise to tell Heechul that his body figure was something that all females were hounding after – white skin, slim body, nice waist.

  And nice hands.

  Heechul fell quiet for so long that Hankyung felt that the elder had perhaps forgotten all about his seme-uke dilemma, and that now was a safe time to run to the bathroom and shower without intrusion - when Heechul opened his mouth.

  “We should prove them wrong.”

  Hankyung hoped that he’d heard wrongly.

  “We should prove them wrong.” Heechul said again, looking at Hankyung with a sort of fiery determination in his eyes. “You hear me, Hankyung? We should prove the fans wrong, that I should be the one topping in these fics… and real life.”

  Hankyung’s face went hot as Heechul moved closer to him. “We should prove them wrong.” Heechul’s voice became lower… huskier. "What do you think, Hankyung?”

  “… Me?” Hankyung swallowed. He became cross-eyed trying to stare at his advancing hyung. “Save me,” he muttered in Chinese. “Somebody please save me.”

  “I know what that means!” Heechul’s voice was loud and triumphant. Especially loud and triumphant, since Heechul was right in front of him.“ ‘Jiu ming ah!’ That means ‘save me’!”

  Hankyung winced at him. Heechul frowned at him and blushed.

  “I don’t mean… I’m not saying… Gah! You idiot!” He whacked Hankyung hard on the shoulder. “I’m not saying that we should record the both of us having sex and then post it up on the Internet!”

  “Then how else are you going to prove to the fans that you are a seme?” Hankyung asked, redder now that Heechul had figured out what he was thinking about.

  Heechul smiled. “Modifications to our images. For example, you could start fetching water for me and massaging me when a camera is near. That would obviously prove that I am in dominance.”

  “No it wouldn’t.” Hankyung shot back, unwilling to ‘fetch water’ for Heechul. Honestly, Hankyung didn’t mind ‘passing the cup of water to Heechul’, but ‘fetching water’, as Heechul had phrased, sounded like it was something beneath his dignity. “It would just make me seem like a nice, caring boyfriend.”

  There was a pause of three seconds until the last word of Hankyung’s sentence fully registered in both their heads.

  “I don’t mean-“ Heechul pulled away from Hankyung. “I’m not asking you to be my boyfriend!”

  “Then what are you talking about?!” Hankyung moved closer to the door.

  “Argh!” Heechul yelled in frustration. “I’m tired of bottoming in fanfics, okay?”

  “Well, you’re not bottoming in real life, so what’s the problem?!”

  “But the fans think that we’re all gay, and if that wasn’t bad enough, they think that I’m the kind that likes to bottom people like you!”

  “What’s wrong with bottoming me?” Hankyung demanded, his pride a little wounded. “I have a nice figure. I have long legs, and my ass sticks out. Shouldn’t you be honored or something?”

  “Honored?!” Heechul snorted. “What’s so honorable about bottoming you in fanfics? Especially when half the time a vibrator is being shoved up my ass?”

  “At least I have sex with you! You, of all people! You are always the demanding bitch and I’m always the nice and kind boyfriend who has to put up you’re your everything, from the way you shop to the way you fuck!! I’m the really terrific guy who has to have sex with you!!”

  “So?! What does you being nice have anything to do with us having sex?”

  “Only a guy like me would be willing to be your boyfriend! I’m even willing to have sex with you! Doesn’t that say something about me being very nice and kind?”

  “That doesn’t mean that you have to top me every single time!”

  “The fact that I’m nice gives me enough worth to top you!”

  “I disagree!”

  “I don’t!”

  The both of them were now nose to nose. “I bet I can top you better!” Heechul huffed.

  “You can’t!” Hankyung snapped. “I’m manlier then you, at any rate!”

  “Muscles don’t make you manly!”

  “I bet mine is bigger then yours!”

  Heechul blushed and pulled the bathrobe tight around his waist. “You don’t like dominance!”

  “Who said that?”

  “Me! And my stand is justified, I've known you for ages!” Heechul jabbed a finger at his chest to emphasize his point, lost his balance and pitched forward towards Hankyung.

  “I like dominance,” Hankyung growled, his voice lowering as he went into ‘alpha male’ mode. He grabbed Heechul forcefully on the shoulders and looked Heechul straight in the eye. “What makes you think I don’t?”

  “You’re too nice and caring." Heechul makes little quotation marks with his fingers. "Caring boyfriends don’t top. Besides, you don’t even know what dominance in bed means!”

  “It means shoving a penis up your ass!”

  “That’s why I’m manlier and smarter then you! Dominant people are the ones thinking up kinky ideas to surprise their partner. I’m best at surprising others, so I’m more dominant! Not like you! Penis up the ass? Tch! Who even does that anymore?!”

  “I have good ideas! I am surprising!”

  “Hah! So surprise me, then!”

  “Fine!” With Heechul’s ego rubbing up his nose, Hankyung did something completely un-Hankyung-like. He grabbed Heechul’s head and planted a very large kiss on his lips, not dissimilar to when Heechul grabbed Siwon and raped him with his mouth onstage during one of their recent show.

  Heechul was so surprised that he didn’t kiss back. Hankyung shut his eyes and licked the inside of Heechul’s mouth, enjoying the feel of a new and foreign mouth. He kissed slowly and sensually, and still the elder did not respond.

  Good, he thought, sucking powerfully on Heechul’s lips. They really were soft and nice, like what the fanfic writers wrote. I surprised you, smartass.

  Heechul grabbed his shoulders and pulled himself away from Hankyung. Hankyung grinned evilly. Heechul’s cheeks were flaming red. “What are you doing?” Heechul says. Hankyung thought he was asking him, and was about to formulate a clever and witty response when Heechul added, “Kyuhyun!”

  Kyuhyun? Hankyung turned around.

  Sure enough, Cho Kyuhyun was standing at the bedroom door, mouth open in shock. “I was… I was going to ask Hankyung if I could take Rong Rong out for a walk,” he said weakly.

  “You can.” Hankyung was so distracted by the appearance of his dongsaeng that he didn't even stop to consider the list of possible reasons, none of them good, as to why Kyuhyun might want to take his dog out for a walk. Instead, he developed a sudden and unexplainable interest in Kyuhyun’s slippers.

  “How much did you hear?” Heechul asked sharply. Hankyung looked up. Kyuhyun swallowed and tried for a sheepish smile.

  “From… ‘What’s wrong with bottoming me’…”

  Hankyung’s gaze slipped back downwards. Those were some nice slippers Kyuhyun had on. Pink and fluffy, and very, very Sungmin-ish…

  There was a silence as the three of them pondered on what action to take next.

  “Kyuhyun-ah? We’re not gay. As in Hankyung and I. We’re straight. Right Hankyung?”

  “Of course not! I mean, of course we’re not gay!”

  “Right.” Kyuhyun didn’t sound very convinced. He took two steps away from the bedroom.

  “You don’t believe us,” Heechul said. “But we not lying. We’re honestly not gay!”

  “Of course.” Another two steps. Kyuhyun was now standing in the middle of the hallway. “So… I’ll just go… join the rest of the members in the… living room.”

  Something about the way Kyuhyun said it… Hankyung got up and stormed to the door.

  Donghae, Eunhyuk, and Shindong were crouched on the floor beside his door. Sungmin had carefully positioned himself so that he couldn’t be seen unless you walked out of the door and took a good look at the hallway. Ryeowook and Yesung were peeping out from behind him. Siwon was standing at the end of the hallway, cheeks bright red. Leeteuk and Kangin were sprawled on the floor, looking like they’d tripped over one another trying to get away. Everyone was frozen in their positions. Only Kibum stood beside Leeteuk and Kangin, calmly sipping his coffee, eyebrows raised in amusement.

  Hankyung froze, too. “We’re not gay,” he muttered weakly, acutely aware that probably no one believed him.

  Kibum removed the coffee cup from his lips, looked away and giggled. Since when did Kibum giggled? “Anything you say, hyung,” he replied curtly, with an air of maddening superiority. Changmin’s annoying qualities must be rubbing off on Kibum. “Don’t let us disturb your sex discussion.” And grinning, Kibum pulled out a phone from his pocket and pressed it to his ear. “You got all of that, Changmin?”

  Neither Hankyung nor Heechul slept that night.

A/N: Alright, so the bigger chunks of italic words are from the fanfic Hanchul was reading. I wrote this ages ago and forgot all about it, but now its finally up!! 
And yay, my exams are over!!

[FIC] In a world of precious gems
Hankyung & Heechul
title: In a world of precious gems
characters: Heechul, Kangin, Kibum
genre: Adventure, humor
rating: PG - a bit of violence

  “You… You… idiots!!!”

  Heechul watched in mild astonishment as Kibum launched himself from the high wall they were currently perched upon into the fray of two-meter tall beasts looming below them. With a practiced aim Kibum kicks the nearest thug at the back of its neck, causing it to spit out the precious gems that it had been previously chewing on.

  “A small tiny bit of that crystal-gem is worth enough money to buy a mansion, and you’re eating it?!!”

  There are gems, and then there are crystal-gems. The former was used for the sole purpose of jewelry, while the latter, formally known as kryshar, contained magical powers and were generally used in the making of magic weapons and such. Kibum, who always had an eye out for anything shiny and worth money, was understandably horrified at the sight of huge, red beasts munching away on first-class rarity object kryshar; illegal to anyone outside of high-ranking officials and legalized magicians, and worth a fortune anywhere in this world.

  In fact, that was the main reason why they had crawled up onto the walls of the kryshar mining grounds; to steal a handful of those precious crystal-gems and make a fortune out of it. They had not expected to encounter of kryshar-eating beasts lounging around the mining ground as though they had every business in the world to be there, and before Heechul could think of how they should proceed from there Kibum had launched himself into a near-suicidal attack on the twenty beasts eating up the precious gem.

  Near-suicidal, because despite the fact that throwing oneself into a fray of beasts with strong enough teeth to chew the tough exterior of the kryshar was an act considered dangerous and bordering along insanity, a true suicidal act would be throwing oneself into a fray of monsters.
There was really not much of a difference between beasts and monsters, the latter perhaps bigger, scarier, clever, stronger, and more powerful – in other words, a beast could pick you up with one hand and fling you ten meters to kill you, while a monster could pick you up with one hand and fling you thirty meters to kill you. A mere difference of twenty meters (and brain cells), really.

  Kangin turned from his perch and gave Heechul a He’s not serious look.
  Heechul shrugged. Well, before he regains his senses.

  Kangin rolled his eyes, something Heechul could see pretty well, even though their only light source was the moon and a few of her stars high above their heads. Kangin grabbed the hilt of the sword strapped across his back. Heechul readied his bow. The both of them watched for a chance to attack.

  The beasts were slowly getting over their shock and advancing towards Kibum. Kibum made a tch sound with his mouth and launched the first attack, throwing one of his many knives at the nearest beasts’ eye. It howled in surprise and stepped back, just as his buddies swarmed forward as one.

  Kangin slid down the wall, his bag making a loud, screeching sound against the bricks and henceforth giving away his position, ruining his efforts at making a stealth attack. Heechul heard a grunt of frustration, followed by the sound of blade stabbing flesh. Heechul notched his first arrow. He let it go just as a beast tried for a surprise attack on Kibum. It hit a small spot at the back of its neck, and just as it turned around, swatting angrily at air, Heechul drew his own knife and threw it; the blade lodged itself dead center in the monster’s chest. It fell down, dead. Heechul notched three arrows at one go and shot them at three separate beasts’ head. Kibum seized the moment where all three were confused and quickly threw knives into their backs.

  “Go,” Kangin grunted. “We’ll handle this.” He swung his long sword and gutted a beast on his left.

  Heechul hopped off the wall with more grace than both of his siblings combined. Nimbly he picked up his knife, raced towards the mining area, pulled out a huge, black bag and started hacking at the walls. His knife was sharp and strong and soon enough, chunks of colorful kryshars begin to pile up in his bag.

  Heechul was done when Kibum and Kangin ran over and started hacking at the walls of the mining ground. “Hurry up, hurry up!” Heechul snaps, impatient. Kangin suppresses a grunt. Hyung was calmest and most at ease in battle and only in battle. Most of the time Heechul had quick-witted, arrogant and brusque manner that earned him the reputation as one of the world’s best bargainers. Hyung’s sharp tongue either tires the shopkeeper so much that he just throws the object in question at Heechul for free, or hyung uses his ‘circular logic’ to confuse the poor shopkeeper until he ends up selling his goods at virtually no price at all. Such was the personality of his hyung. Kangin smiles a little at that.

  When they’re done, all three of them sprint out back where they entered from – over the wall – and run back to their hostel, all three of them carrying enough kryshar’s to buy a hundred mansions in this lifetime as well as the next few ones.

A/N: A drabble, of sorts? Might or might not continue it... 

[FIC] Labor pangs
Hankyung & Heechul
title: Labor pangs
characters/pairings: Hanchul, some HaeHyuk
genre: Comedy/Crack, mpreg!!
rating: PG-13

  “Oh… God… my fuck… damn… d-damnit!”
  “Do you think,” Hankyung quips. “That these are the kinds of words that come out of your mouth when we’re having sex?”
  Heechul barely has the time to give Hankyung the finger before another contraction courses through him, causing him to dissolve into hysterical nonsense again. Hankyung half-smiles. Heechul grits his teeth together and glares at him.
  “T-This is… all… y-your-“ Heechul breaks off and twists into an uncomfortable looking position. Hankyung’s smile disappears and his worry returns in full force.
  “Your… fault!!!” Heechul bites down a cry and throws his head down on the pillow. He’s breathing is coming even faster now, and Hankyung squeezes his hand tightly.
  Heechul winces in pain. He glances up at the clock on the wall and says in one quick breath, “Fifteen more minutes to go.”
  Hankyung stares at him. It was just a stupid bet.
  A stupid bet that Hankyung thought up. He’s said that Heechul wouldn’t even last half an hour without screaming when the contractions started, and Heechul had said that he could. So the stupid bet was agreed upon, their motives for agreeing to it utterly different – Hankyung agreed so that Heechul wouldn’t feel so bad about childbirth, while Heechul agreed for his pride.
  It was a stupid, stupid bet, and Hankyung was seriously regretting opening his mouth in the first place. Heechul had told him that he’ll bear with all the pain without screaming for the first half an hour, and that Hankyung was not to press the alarm and scream for Doctor so as to make the bet fair. Which was why, now fifteen minutes in, Hankyung was reduced to cradling Heechul in his arms while the latter writhes and twists in contraction pains.
  It made Hankyung’s heart ache, seeing him like this. But Heechul was having none of it.
  Suddenly he wrenches away from Hankyung and turns to his side; he curls his body into a tight ball around his stomach. “Heechul-ah!” Hankyung says, getting really worried now.
  Heechul turns back to face him, hands tight around his stomach. “Fuck,” he says.
  Hankyung looks to where Heechul’s eyes were staring at. Clear, transparent liquid is flowing from in between Heechul’s legs.
  “Oh fuck,” Heechul breathes. Hankyung looks around the room wildly for the alarm. Heechul grabs him and pulls him back down onto his seat. “F-Fourteen minutes.”
  “It was a stupid bet.” Hankyung says, hugging Heechul fiercely. “It was a fucking stupid bet.”
  “I-I… agreed to it.” Heechul squeezes his fingers so tightly that Hankyung worries that they might fall off. “And so… so did you.”
  “I regret it.” Hankyung meant those three words from the bottom of his heart.
  “W-Why don’t… you e-ver… tell… me… I-love-you-with… ahh… with… so much conviction?”
  “Fuck this.” Hankyung’s eyes were getting wet. “Of course I love you!!”
  Heechul manages to smile. It was a pain-filled smile, but a smile nonetheless.
  Hankyung rests his hand on Heechul’s belly. “Does it hurt a lot?”
  Heechul does his best to give Hankyung his most withering glare. It was a stupid question, Hankyung knew, but maybe giving Heechul a chance to yell at something would take his mind off the pain.
  “Yes it fuck-“ Heechul stops and bites his lips, hard. “-ing hurts a lot.”
  “You know,” Hankyung says, rubbing Heechul’s trembling belly. “Our mothers would like to see three grandchildren.”
  “I don’t care… h-h-how many… they want to see.” Heechul gulps down oxygen. “I just know that…” Heechul chokes down a cry of pain. “That you’re pushing them out in the future.”
  Hankyung strokes Heechul absentmindedly, his eyes staring fixedly on the clock. Outside the ward they hear a shrill, high-pitched scream.
  “Oh,” Heechul tries to sit up. “Who’s that?”
  “Someone in labor.” Hankyung replies, stating the obvious. He cranes his neck to try and see out the closed doors. “I think…” Hankyung sees Donghae running around the hospital, frantic. “I think its Hyukjae.”
  “Oh, him.” There’s something about Heechul’s tone that makes Hankyung turn around and stare at him. “I made a bet with him.”
  Hankyung’s mouth drops open and he looks at Heechul, incredulous. “H-How long more?” he croaks.
  Heechul rolls his eyes. Pretty impressive, seeing as how he was in labor. “O-Of course not. Does Hyukjae look like the kind to last even…” Heechul lets out a cry of pain. Hankyung jumps up and aims his hand for the red alarm button near the bed. Heechul catches him before he could press it.
  “You said scream. I… I didn’t… s-scream.”
  “I’m calling the bet off.” Hankyung couldn’t take it any more. This was getting ridiculous.
  “Don’t.” Heechul winces. The sound shoots through Hankyung’s heart and crumbles it into a million pieces. He sits back down and strokes Heechul’s face. “Don’t,” Heechul repeats. He rests his face in Hankyung’s palm.
  “Interrupt me.” He finishes. He flashes Hankyung a small, triumphant smile. “H-Hyukjae… wouldn’t even last… 30 seconds. The bet was…” Heechul gestures to his trembling belly. “That my baby… would… would come out first.” Then he squeezes his eyes shut in pain.
  “Our baby.” Hankyung corrects. Hankyung looks at the clock. Two more minutes. He sighs and cradles Heechul in his arms. Their eyes meet.
  Heechul gasps in pain. Hankyung kisses his cheek, then kisses his stomach. One more minute.
  Hankyung presses the alarm.


  “Lee Donghae!!!” Hyukjae screams. The effort to produce those words causes him to slump back down against the bed in exhaustion, only to rise in the next second as another contraction rips through him.
  Donghae appears, eyes wild, hair messy, tie undone. “Hyukkie!” he cries, and rushes to hold Hyukjae’s hand.
  “Where were you?!!” Hyukjae bellows at him. He screams in pain and swears, breathing hard, raw, and uneven.
  “Looking for the doctor!” Donghae squeaks. Hyukjae cannot believe his husband’s idiocy at a time like this. “Button,” he manages.
  Donghae’s hands fly to his shirt’s buttons. “Button?” he repeats.
  “That one!!” Hyukjae slams his hand into the red alarm button.


  “Breathe, just breathe, Heechul-shi…”
  Heechul lets loose a string of colorful profanities from his mouth. “He said breathe,” Hankyung chides him. “Not swear!”
  “Fuck!!” Heechul chokes out. He screams loud, high, on an impossible note.
  The doctor had rushed in within two minutes after the alarm had sounded. He’d placed his hand on Heechul’s belly for a while, then proceeded to rip Heechul’s hospital gown in half so as to better feel Heechul’s stomach. Hankyung just stared at him and resisted the urge to punch the doctor. It looked like he was groping Heechul’s belly. Heechul just screamed in his arms. The doctor then pulled a curtain over Heechul’s stomach, which put a green cloth between them and the doctor. Hankyung supposed that it was less embarrassing this way, and that the doctor could… do his work without his patient witnessing it, but then the doctor placed three fingers on Heechul’s belly, which both Heechul and Hankyung regarded with alarm.
  Hankyung watches as he tapped the fingers, one at a time. One, two, three.
  Heechul screams his loudest scream yet. Hankyung gripped Heechul tighter. Their eyes met briefly.
  One, two, three.
  Heechul screams again. Hankyung watches, agog. It seems the doctor seem to know when the largest contraction would hit. One, two, three.
  Heechul screams, and this time tears squeeze out of his eyes. Hankyung swallows, feeling useless. Heechul grabs onto Hankyung’s arm, and manages hoarsely, “The fingers…”
  One, two, three. Another scream.
  “Get them away,” Heechul whimpers in Hankyung’s arms. “I don’t want them- mngggg – THEREEEEE!!”
  Hankyung slips his hand onto Heechul’ stomach, making sure to knock off the doctor’s fingers along the way.
  Judging from Heechul’s face, his little ruse didn’t work. The doctor must have found somewhere else to tap his three fingers. Heechul lets out a cry that sounded halfway between determination and desperation.
  Then suddenly, Heechul’s screaming manner changed. “Ah…” he cries out. “Ah… Ah… Hankyung!!”
  “What, what are you doing?” Hankyung splutters.
  “Sorry,” he hears the doctor’s muffled voice from behind the curtain. “The baby is upside-down… we’ll have to turn him.”
  Heechul yelps in pain and horror. “He’s twisting my stomach!!” He chokes out. “Hankyung!!”
  Hankyung edges himself further in to the bed, resting Heechul’s head on his chest. That way Heechul wouldn’t be able to see the look of alarm/fury/horror on Hankyung’s face. From his new point of view Hankyung could clearly see fingertips appearing on Heechul’s stomach. Heechul cries out, “No!” and Hankyung hears a grunt from behind the curtain.
  “Hankyung-ah!!!” Heechul all but screams. Hankyung watches as the fingers gripped Heechul’s stomach and… turns. Hankyung places both hands on Heechul’s face, and turns it so that Heechul is only looking at him. “Ignore it,” he whispers feverently. “Just ignore it.”
  “Ignore it?!” Hankyung sees a murderous glint in Heechu’s eyes, and it’s through pure luck that he manages to seize Heechul’s hands just before they dig his eyeballs out. “I – can’t – “ He breaks off into a bloodcurdling scream.
  “That’s right, just push, Heechul-shi!”
  “I – I –“
  “Alright.” The curtain moves a little, and a face pops into view. Hankyung presumes it belongs to the doctor. “I’ll head off to check on my other patient for a while. You just stay here and push.”
  He disappears before Hankyung manages to close his gaping mouth.


  “Where’s the fucking doctor?!!” Hyukjae screams.


  “I want a better doctor.” Heechul manages the instant the doctor has gone. “I – want –“
  “Just hurry up and get the baby out, then we can leave already!” Hankyung cries. Not to be unsympathetic but this whole labor thing wasn’t doing very well on Hankyung’s nerves. He’d never seen Heechul scream so hard or cry so bad before, and what was up with the weird doctor, anyway?
  “I don’t even – know - where the baby is going to come out from!!”
  “But I don’t want to stay here any longer!!”
  “Neither – do –“ Heechul breaks off and pushes, hard. He cries out in pain. Hankyung massages his belly. He could feel the head of the baby at the bottom, hard like a watermelon.
  Heechul’s screams hit a whole new level just as the doctor re-enters, beaming cheerfully. “How’s it going, folks?”
  I’m going to kill you, Hankyung thinks, angrily and slightly desperately. There’s got to be better doctors than this one. He turns his attention back to Heechul, who’s soaked to the bone in sweat and tears. “FUUUUCK!!!!!” Heechul screams.
  “You’re doing well, Heechul-shi! Almost there!!”
  Heechul swears even more at that. “The baby can hear you!” Hankyung reminds him, feeling slightly better now that the ordeal was nearing its end. His arm, his poor arm. It can finally get some rest now.
  “You did this to me.” Heechul pants, eyeing Hankyung like a hawk might eye its prey. “You – did this – to me.”
  “I’m sorry?”
  “Sorry doesn’t CUT AT IT!!!”
  “Almost, Heechul-shi!!”
  “Fuck you!!!”
  “Push, Heechul-shi!!”
  “Next time,” Heechul breathes. “NEXT TIME!!!!”
  “Come on, Heechul-shi!!”
  “You’re doing it,” Heechul dissolves as the pain becomes too much to bear. “Next time,” his body contorts, and squeezes out the baby from him.
  “You’re doing it…” Exhaustion claims him, and Heechul’s eyelids drift shut. “Next time… you’re doing it…”
  “Okay okay okay!!!” Hankyung whispers, clutching Heechul to his chest. “I’ll do it, I’ll do it…”


A few years later

  “Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you!!” Heechul says the minute he’s shoved their young son out of the front door over to Hyukjae’s house to play.
  “What?” Hankyung says. The only thing he’d remembered doing wrong was the only thing he’d remembered not doing… which was to take out the trash, but really, that can be done at any time of the day.
  “I’m fucking pregnant!!!” Heechul hollers at him. Hankyung feels winded.
  “Really?” he says, the delight in his voice not matching Heechul’s thunderous face. “How many months?”
  Heechul slaps every available part of Hankyung he could reach. “Fuck you, I don’t want to go into labor again!!!”
  Hankyung just grabs him and kisses him. “After you get this one out, you’ll just have to get pregnant one more time!!” he says, enthusiastic.
  “Fuck you!!” Heechul says, one hand protectively on his stomach, the other punching Hankyung in his stomach.



  It takes all the effort in the world to push out a baby, and to Heechul’s horror the pain doesn’t stop once his child is out.
  “M-My stomach… still hurts.” Heechul stares at Hankyung, desperate. What was going on?
  Heechul feels it, the weird doctor’s fingers, tapping on his belly, one, two, three, and pain rips through Heechul once more.
  “Isn’t it obvious?” says the doctor cheerfully. Heechul feels the familiar weight of a baby inside of him. He grabs Hankyung’s arm for support.
  “You’re pregnant with twins!”


A/N: I googled 'Super Junior mpreg fanfic community' and came up with nothing. Damn, we need one.
I don't really know what Hyukhae is doing in here~ But oh well. And I don't know about how you're imagining the weird doctor and his three tapping fingers, but to me he roughly looks like... Yesung.
Hanchul having a baby~ I'll write a serious one soon... 

By the way, how does one post drabbles (html??)?

[Drabbles] Super Junior/DBSK Drabbles
Hankyung & Heechul
My Son’s Underwear
Characters/Pairing: Mother!Leeteuk/Son!Heechul, slight Hanchul | 397 words

  It’s 10 o’ clock in the morning, and Leeteuk wonders why her dear son has not yet already crawled out of his bed. Heechul, despite his princessy and bossy attitude, has a thing for punctuality, and likes to be on time for anything, anywhere.

  The minute hand ticks to 10:05 and the Princess enters the kitchen – hair in a rat’s nest, T-shirt unruly and stretched, and are those Hankyung’s boxers – throws himself down on the seat directly opposite his mother.

  “Good morning, mom,” he purrs, trademark grin on his face.

  Leeteuk’s brows raise, but instead of responding with a ‘Morning’ she finds herself wondering at the pair of boxers that Heechul was wearing. Being the woman of the household should give her some clue as to what boxers her one and only son wears, and that black Calvin Klein underwear isn’t on the list. Heechul prefers them red. That could either mean that Heechul went out and bought himself new boxers – completely unnecessary, given the sheer size of his underwear drawer – or that the boxer belongs to Hankyung.

  And if it did, Leeteuk muses, where did he get it from, because Hankyung slept in their spare guest room last night and it made no sense that Heechul would have his underwear on, so-

  “Mom?” Heechul waves his hand at her. “What’s wrong?”

  Leeteuk blinks. “No. Nothing. What’s up with you, though?” she asks, indicating Heechul’s delighted, smug attitude.

  The cat-like grin stretches out fully on his face, revealing his sharper, vampire teeth at the corners. Heechul rubs his hair, messing it up even more; then he rubs his face, then his ears, then his neck – his shirt slides low and Leeteuk sees a thin red line – Heechul leans forward, and rests his head on his right hand, and his mouth parts, his eyes dark and serious, as though he’s about to reveal something secretive and of utmost importance-

  “I just had sex with my boyfriend.”

  Or at least, that’s what Leeteuk imagines Heechul to say. In truth Heechul doesn’t say anything at all, but Leeteuk still manages to choke on her omelet nevertheless. Right on cue Hankyung walks out, from Heechul’s bedroom, Leeteuk notes, and he’s in an equally mangled shirt. Leeteuk takes in the unkempt hair, the small, claw-like scratches on his arm, and her gaze shift low – some things are better left unknown – and falls on the red Calvin Klein underwear Hankyung’s wearing.

So that’s where Heechul’s underwear has been.

  Heechul purrs in bliss.

Office Hours
Characters/Pairing: Kimin, minor Changkyu &andKihae | 180 words

  Changmin threw himself onto Kibum, pressing the older (but shorter) one up against the wall. He felt his own pulse quicken, his heart thumping with excitement, and his member, turning hard with sheer anticipation. Finally, finally.

  It had taken time, many, many long hours of thinking and planning, before Changmin had finally gotten Kim Kibum into the position he had desired to see him in since the first day he’d laid his eyes on the older boy.

  Which was thus; lips’ parted, moaning beneath him, eyes dark and smoky, filled with want, body shaking, ready, waiting, wanting, needing-

  Changmin tore off Kibum’s coat and threw it somewhere in his office. Kibum ripped off his tie. Changmin got his hands on   Kibum’s belt. There was a soft woosh as Kibum’s pants slipped off him. Changmin bent down and got busy with his mouth.

  Kibum moans and Changmin’s heart leaps to his mouth. He doesn’t regret this at all. Screw Human Resources, Changmin has to let this boy feel heaven, before either Kyuhyun or Donghae returns from their business trip in China.

Didn’t See You in Months, How’re You Doing?
Characters/Pairings: Hyuksu, Yunjae (mpreg?!) | 335 words

  Junsu’s mouth hangs open wordlessly. Granted, he’s been away in Japan for seven months, and a lot of things can happen in seven months. You could forget how to say ‘Sunday’s Seafood Special Hot Pot with Crab and Mushrooms’ in Korean, the local Starbucks might move a couple of blocks down, and half of Korea might debut in new idol groups within seven months time.

  But even the sky falling down in seven months didn't compare to what Junsu was seeing currently with his own two eyes.

  “H-H-Hyukjae?!” he stutters in shock. “What happened?!”

  His best friend didn’t even seem to register him. He – she just continues to wait in line for her order.

  Impossible, Junsu reasons with himself. Seven months is definitely not long enough for your best friend to change sex, get pregnant, and forget you. Impossible.

  But still. Hyukjae, pregnant?! The father might not be him, but Junsu still wanted to be part of the baby’s life. He could be a godfather, or something. And obviously he would want to sit down with Donghae and have a nice long chat on how to take care of Hyukjae and his – her stomach. And naturally he would want to be invited to the wedding, whenever that was.

  So Junsu steels himself and taps his friend on the shoulder. He needs to have a talk with Hyukjae – like right now, this instant - to remind somebody of his forever, continuous and unwavering support in her life.


  “Do you think we should stop him now?” Jaejoong whispers from behind the menu.

  “You think?” Yunho whispers back. They’d watched Junsu squeal for a bit before falling into what seemed like a period of immense thought and concentration. Yunho’s brows furrow.

  “But you know,” Yunho adds, as they watch Junsu tap the lady-who-looks-like-Hyukjae on the shoulder. “If he does something embarrassing, I don’t want people to think that I know him, you know?”

  A small muttering from Jaejoong’s direction showed that he agreed.

Cup Sizes
Characters/Pairings: Kyuhyun, Kibum, Changmin, Yunho, Yoochun | 247 words

  It was a nice afternoon as they sat on a table outside the cafe, tucked away in the shade, hot teas in hand, legs crossed, with a gentle breeze blowing them. Five perfect models, still and unmoving, only the eyes flicking by as the occasional woman walked by them.

  The latest one was tall and tanned, wearing dark denim jeans, and deep red sleeveless V-neck, and had the smooth hair from the shampoo commercials to match her outfit. A beauty. Changmin whistled softly as she passed by him, breaking the silence from before.

  The beauty turned a corner and disappeared from their line of view. Kyuhyun waited until she was completely gone before saying softly, “32 C.”

  Kibum made a big show of slurping his tea. He placed the cup down firmly on the table, his eyes boring into Kyuhyun’s along the way. “B,” he said.

  “No way,” Yoochun, always the expert, replied. “30 C, maybe.”

  “Perverts,” Changmin said, stretching the last syllable on his tongue. He was, naturally, ignored. Nobody missed hearing his whistle a few seconds ago.

  Yunho thumped his cup down loudly on the table. “What are you guys talking about? She’s obviously 32 A-B.”

  Kyuhun and Kibum snorted into their teas. Yoochun let out a bark of laughter. “Which one’s A, hyung?” he chuckled.

  Changmin’s comment was the most withering, as usual. “You,” he exclaimed, exasperated. “Go drink your tea, you, 37 B!”

  Yunho promptly ignores them for the rest of the afternoon.

The Nice Librarian
Characters/Pairings: Kangteuk, Ryeowook | 339 words

  Ryeowook slides his book across the tabletop. The tall librarian scans the book, and chops down a date – due in two weeks time.

  Done with his book, Ryeowook moves aside to let his hyung check out his books. It turns out that Youngwoon-hyung actually enjoys reading poetry in his spare time. Youngwoon hands the book over, and the librarian blushes. He ducks his head, scans the book quickly and hands it back to Youngwoon, all the while furiously avoiding his gaze. Ryeowook frowns.

  “What was that, hyung?” Ryeowook inquires, once they’d left the library.

  Youngwoon looks at him. “Nothing?” he says.

  “The librarian didn’t chop your book.” Ryeowook squints at the older boy, trying to draw the truth out of him from sheer willpower alone. Ryeowook, for all his innocent smiles and cute antics, had a shrewd and mischievous personality hidden right beneath. “That’s as good as saying that you don’t have to return that book, ever. Out with it hyung, what did you do to him?”



  “Again,” Youngwoon grunted. “My name.” He thrust hard, deep into the other, earning a passionate cry from Jungsu. “Say it again.”

  Jungsu gasps. Youngwoon’s heart felt light and fluttery at the sound. “Youngwoon-ah!!” he cried out, nails digging into Youngwoon’s back.

  Youngwoon thrust again, and Jungsu collapses on top of him, a string of nonsense babbling from his mouth. Youngwoon can feel his peak coming, so near, so close, but it’s still Leeteuk who comes first.

  Leeteuk comes, messy and hard, all over Youngwoon and the hard tiles of the library floor. Youngwoon got a few more thrusts before he came, too. They lie on the floor, panting, tired, and satisfied.


  “Nothing,” Youngwoon says plainly. Ryeowook’s pupils disappear in the silts he’s giving Youngwoon. The older holds his breath. After a few seconds Ryeowook backs away, the devil, snake-like slits gone to reveal his huge, adorably misleading brown eyes again. Youngwoon silently thanks God for his natural ability to lie at any time of the day, under any circumstance.

[FIC] Hankyung's Science Report
Hankyung & Heechul
title: Hankyung's Science Report
characters/pairings: Hanchul
genre: School!AU, Humour
rating: PG-13

Science Report

Subject: Kim Heechul
Objective: What are the songs best suited for subject to be able to sleep well at night?

Experiment 1:
Objective: What are the songs the subject listens to before the subject sleeps?

Assuming the environment is kept controlled (environment: between 10pm to 2am, in their dorms on his bed),

  1. Sneak in while subject is bathing
  2. Sneak up to subject’s ipod and look through the files
  3. Record down findings
  4. Sneak away
*Observe subject from a distance

Subject likes to listen to a fixed playlist titled ‘Bedtime songs’, which consists of soft, gentle ballad songs. Depending on subject’s mood, it takes up to a minimum of 4 songs and a maximum 4 albums before subject can fall asleep.

Experiment 2:
Objective: What if subject’s choice bedtime songs were changed? (Testing three other songs)

Assuming the environment is kept controlled,

  1. Sneak in while subject is bathing
  2. Sneak up to subject’s ipod
  3. Steal it and plug it into computer
  4. Download new songs into his ipod
  5. Create new playlist
  6. Place subject’s ipod where it was originally
  7. Sneak away
*Observe subject from a distance
(*Note: Observe subject from a distance, as subject could be dangerous and a safety hazard to physical being and mental state otherwise)

When playing:
Hurricane Venus: Subject becomes wide-awake. Subject gets up and dances electronic-maniac-supersonic-bionic-energetically to the song. Often subject engages others to dance along. Energy meter: 9.5/10. Not a good bedtime song. Subject takes a long time to fall asleep.
Two Different Tears: Subject nods to the rhythm of the song. The subject occasionally gets up to dance to the song. The subject frequently manages to fall asleep while listening to the song. Energy meter: 7.5/10. An average bedtime song. Subject takes quite some time to fall asleep.
Mirotic: Subject becomes wide-awake and energetic. Subject gets up and dances to the song. Subject becomes visibly excited and horny. Symptoms include an obvious bulge in crotch area and lots of heavy breathing. Subject then ends up having sex. Energy meter: 10/10. Not a good bedtime song, but a good sex song. Subject falls asleep immediately after sex, anyway. So sex is a good bedtime thing.

In conclusion:
Subject should only listen to Mirotic before sleeping. Results (above) have proven that Mirotic and sex are far more effective then any of the other songs, in the sense that it does not keep the subject up till the next morning and only has to be played once. It is beneficial to subject’s muscles and helps keep the subject in good shape. It is also extremely entertaining to subject. Not only that, Mirotic also works on all days, regardless of subject’s moods in the earlier part of the day. Hence Mirotic is the best and most recommended bedtime song for subject Kim Heechul.  

[FIC] 22 Steps to Get Your Man
Hankyung & Heechul
title: 22 Steps to Get Your Man
characters/pairings: None - Implied Hanchul
genre: School!AU, Romance, Humour
rating: PG-13
notes: Wrote this together with bananallama26 in English class today, when the teacher told us to "Write 10 steps on How to Make and Keep Friends" :) Heechul making lists is Daebak!!

1. Find your man

2. Say: "Hannie, you're so hot, I want to marry you and have your babies." 

2. Find a chance to sit beside him

3. Rub your leg along his thigh sensually (or hand, if your leg isn't very convenient) 

4. Lick your lips subtly while staring at his chest 

5. Try to maintain eye contact, but look shyly away when he stares at you (flutter your eyelashes) 

6. Invite him out to the beach (bring camera along)
7. Compliment his chest and arms and legs (and manly region)

8. Get him to stay and watch the sunset with you

9. Make him comfortable on the sand (and make yourself comfortable on him)

10. Lean in close to him, with half-parted lips and half-shut eyes

11. Kiss him 

*Due to the extreme success of these simple, easy-to-follow 11 steps, another 11 have been added to further help interested parties to take 'Getting Your Man' to the next level, 'Keeping Your Man'

12. When eating together, steal food off his plate, preferably a food that he's already taken a bite out of. Comment on how good it tastes

13. Accidentally on purpose spill sauce on your shirt and take it off to reveal an extremely low-cut and revealing tank top. Watch his face

14. Pull out bottles of soju and invite him to drink with you

15. 'Get drunk' after 2 half-cups

16. Walk tipsily and find a chance to fall on him

17. 'Fall unconscious' in his arms

18. When he finally carries you onto his bed, start muttering 'nonsense' under your breath (like: "Hannie... you are the angel of my dreams...")

19. Randomly thrash around in 'drunken stupor' and pin him down under you

20. Say "It's hot" and take off your tank top 

21. Say "Aren't you hot?" and take off his shirt

22. Have his babies

A/N: 'Perfection' isn't even officially out yet but I'm completely addicted to it already. I almost died from hotness overload watching the MV teaser XD I want the album bad! Meanwhile my brain likes to fantasize images and entertain myself, like this:
Can you imagine 8 of them on stage... in their Russian Prince clothing, singing into their microphones, dancing with the beat, totally owning the stage and... - wait for it - at the chorus, RIP! - throwing off all their thick clothing, showing off sexy arms and lots and lots of skin and-
Okay I'll stop here, spazzing like hell now XD
Previous posted on allkpop, I got like 15+ likes for it. Nice to see everyone's mind on the same thing as me, doesn't make me feel like I'm the only one with a twisted brain. Jay Chou wrote a song for them! Zhoumi has red hair (HOT)! Eunhyuk rapped in English (HOTTER) - Baby gasp my name - And-
Okay I'll stop, I really must stop...

[FIC] Valentines Day
Hankyung & Heechul
title: Valentines Day
characters/pairings: SiHanChul, Hyuksu, Others: Kyuhyun/Zhoumi, Sungmin/Almost everyone, Yunjae, Jaemin, Kangteuk
genre: School!AU, Romance, Humour, Fluff
rating: PG-13

  Hankyung had been squatting on this very spot for the past ten minutes, going through his plan over and over again in his head, trying to decide whether or not he should go along with it.
  “Hankyung,” his friend, Zhoumi, moaned into his ear. “Hurry up! My legs are beginning to cramp!”
  Hankyung shushed his friend urgently and continued to peer out from behind the leaves of the potted plant that he was currently hiding behind.
  “If you’re not going to make up your mind soon,” Zhoumi threatened. “I’m going to leave you crouching here like an idiot all by yourself.”
  Zhoumi never ever meant any of his threats and Hankyung had gotten used to not taking heed of his best friend’s warnings, but Zhoumi had a point there. In the event that Zhoumi did decide to walk out and leave Hankyung all alone, the very sight of his tall figure and taller legs suddenly sticking out and emerging from behind a potted plant could be potentially embarrassing and only very humiliating, which would ruin Hankyung’s whole plan of being subtle but to-the-point on this Valentine’s Day. So he grabbed Zhoumi’s wrist to stop him from leaving (and to give himself a bit of moral support) and asked, “That guy there, what’s his name again? Jungsu or something?”
  “Junsu.” Hankyung could hear Zhoumi practically roll his eyes to heaven. “I told you, Junsu’s the one with the big butt and Jungsu’s the one without the butt. If you can’t remember that then you could remember the fact that Junsu’s probably gay with Lee Hyukjae and Jungsu’s probably gay with that scary Youngwoon guy-“
  “Okay okay!” Hankyung answered frantically. “I get it!” And taking in a great gulp of breath, Hankyung got up from behind the potted plant and stepped bravely to where Junsu with the big butt was selling Valentine Day’s candies and flowers in a booth adorned with Valentine Day ribbons and colors.
  “Valentine Day gifts for your love ones!” He squeaked to the mass of students in the cafeteria. “A real bargain! Pay for a rose and we’ll deliver it! Valentine Day gifts for your love ones!”
  Hankyung stopped halfway when he realized that Zhoumi was not following him. He turned around, only to find his friend still crouched behind the potted plant.
  “You- What are you doing?” Hankyung lapsed into Chinese, since that way no one else but them would understand (unless that small chubby Canadian kid was around). Zhoumi was still stuck in his position from where Hankyung last saw him, looking uncomfortable and embarrassed (which was a weird frog-like position, and if Hankyung didn’t know better he would say that he Zhoumi must have been a girl who’s period suddenly came and leaked through her school skirt and was now sitting like that so that no one could see the red poppy on her butt).
  “My legs are cramp,” Zhoumi grimaced apologetically.
  Hankyung’s eyes narrowed at him and he exhaled slowly. Reminding himself that Zhoumi was in this predicament only because of him, Hankyung made his way back to the potted plant, only to stop, seeing his friend’s frantic head-shakings.
  “Go get the rose for your Valentine.” Zhoumi said, with the air of a hero about to sacrifice himself for the cause for a greater good. “I’ll be fine.
  Hankyung frowned. Not exactly reassured, he turned his back towards the Valentine Gift booth.
  Hankyung’s eyes widened like a goldfish and he blushed furiously. It looked like Junsu and Hyukjae were gay, after all. The pair of them   were making out passionately at the booth, drawing the attention of many snickering passer-bys. Hankyung was just about to turn around a second time when his eyes landed on a piece of paper on the booth in front of the two busy students.
  A list, on which gift to be delivered to whom. A small glimmer of hope bubbled in Hankyung’s chest, and though the chances of that ever happening were close to zero, curiosity got the better of him and he decided to inch forward and check out the list.
  Unfortunately, getting a better look at the list meant getting a clearer insight as to the smooching Junsu and Hyukjae. Hankyung blushed steadily as the both of them kissed without stopping to take a full breath – the only pauses those two ever took were three seconds long – one second to gulp down some air and two seconds to compliment the other’s bodily features.
  It went something like this:
  “God – Junsu you have a nice - fine ass – “
  “Fuck – Hyuk, oh fuck, mmmm –“
  “I love – you, so – much, baby – “
  “Me – too, Hyuk – ngmfff – “
  “I want – your mouth – somewhere – uhhh – else Su!”  
  “Heh – baby, dancer – muscles – mmmfff – I – like – “
  It didn’t help that they were groping one another everywhere, on the arms, on the back, on the butt, on the crotch- Hankyung tiptoed past the busy duo and made his way to the list.

Buyer                                         Receiver
Lee SungminCho Kyuhyun (Rose)
 Choi Siwon (Rose)
 Kim Youngwoon (Rose)
 Kim Joungwoon (Rose)
 Kim Kibum (Rose)
 Park Yoochun (Candy + Rose)
Park YoochunLee Sungmin (Candy + Rose)
Jung YunhoKim Jaejoong (Candy + Rose)
Shim ChangminKim Jaejoong (Candy + Rose)
Kim YoungwoonPark Jungsu (Candy + Rose)
 Kim Heechul (Rose)
Park JungsuKim Youngwoon (Candy + Rose)
Choi SiwonKim Heechul (Rose)
Cho Kyuhyun Kim Heechul (Rose)
 Zhoumi (Rose)
Kim JoungwoonKim Heechul (Rose)
Kim Kibum Kim Heechul (Rose)
Lee HyukjaeKim Junsu (Lee Hyukjae + Candy + Rose)

  The list ended there with Lee Hyukjae, which, Hankyung supposed, was when the person in question threw himself on the shop vendor and kept him otherwise occupied and unable to take down more orders. Hankyung felt his shoulders slump. He wasn’t expecting anything, really, he wasn’t very well known in this school; how could he have expected anything from… well… only the most popular pretty boy in the whole campus, Kim Heechul? He was probably nothing to Kim Heechul… In fact, Hankyung was nobody. A nobody from China, who spoke halting Korean with a thick accent. Why, even Zhoumi was receiving a rose from someone: Cho Kyuhyun, his crush for ages
  And even if Hankyung did buy the rose and candy for Heechul, what’s to say that the latter would know it’s him? Five other men were sending Heechul the exact same thing, and Hankyung supposed this whole delivering gifts thing was anonymous. Dejected, Hankyung turned away, towards the potted plant where he knew Zhoumi was still sitting there, stuck, when he slammed into someone else and sent that person stumbling backwards.
  “Sorry!” Hankyung’s head shot up and a torrent of apologies fell from his mouth. “Sorry, sorry, sorry…” He reached forward and helped the unlucky passer-by up. “Sorry, I’m so sorry…”
  “It’s okay, it’s okay… I’m fine, don’t worry…”
  Hankyung froze. That voice… He looked up slowly, only to see the beautiful face of Kim Heechul inches away from his own. He looked a little ruffled up, probably due to the fact that he just got knocked very painfully onto the ground, but that didn’t change anything, he still looked beautiful. The angelic face, framed by strawberry-blonde hair, those brown eyes, Hankyung’s heart rate sky-rocketed and he stood there, staring at his crush for ages.
  “H-Heechul…” he stammered. “You… You’re Heechul…”
  Heechul gave him a small smile. Small, but dazzling nonetheless. “Hi.” He shrugged, an action that Hankyung found extremely endearing. “I’m Heechul.”
  Hankyung would have stood there gaping at Heechul forever were it not for his beautiful moment with Kim Heechul the Angel from Heaven interrupted by a sharp voice, “So, you guys are buying or what?”
  Hankyung turned, only to see that Lee Hyukjae had finally let go of his boyfriend, Kim Junsu, who was sitting there, panting slightly, staring at the pair of them.
  “Buying?” Hankyung echoed. He frowned, feeling confused, then he turned back only to see Heechul still standing there, looking as perfect as ever, and his hand clutching onto Heechul’s elbow.
  The hand he forgot to remove after helping Heechul up.
  Hankyung managed not to yelp out loud and hastily removed his clingy hand, stuffing it deep inside his pants pocket. He’d made a total fool of himself in front Kim Heechul. Hankyung felt slightly sick in his stomach. Somebody shoot him now.
  “Sorry,” Hankyung mumbled. His cheeks were flaming red, and he was aware that everyone was staring at them. “Sorry, Heechul-shi.”   Hankyung kept his head bowed low.
  The thing was, as the new kid from a foreign land it hadn’t been easy for Hankyung to make friends in the first place. He only had one friend, Zhoumi, and his obvious lack of interaction with the rest of his classmates quickly singled him out from the rest of the crowd. He didn’t really know how to communicate with others, he didn’t really know how to make small talk with people (he couldn’t even hold a proper, five minute conversation with Kim Ryeowook), and here he was, on Valentine’s Day, standing in front of Kim Heechul, blubbering and stammering like a fool.
  “It’s alright.” Heechul laughed lightly. Hankyung chanced a glance upwards, and he noticed that Heechul cheeks were a little pink too.   “Don’t worry about it, I’m fine.”
  They stood there in an awkward silence, Hankyung blushing like a blossoming cherry when Heechul finally cleared his throat and said, “Well, Hankyung-shi, are you buying anything?”
  He knows my name. Hankyung felt his stomach flutter with a thousand butterflies. Kim Heechul knew his name!
  “You – you first.” Hankyung managed, and stepped aside for Heechul to make his purchase.
  “But you were here first.”
  “N-No, it’s fine, you – you can go – “
  “Yah, Kim Heechul!” A loud, arrogant voice rang throughout the cafeteria.
  All at once, the students started whispering excitedly among themselves. They parted and allowed a path for the person with that loud voice to pass through. Hankyung stared. A tall, strutting Choi Siwon emerged, with his hair as gelled as ever and his chest as puffed out as forever. He strode smartly over to the pair of them, completely ignored Hankyung, grabbed Heechul’s hand and planted a kiss there which was far too long and far too loud for Hankyung’s liking.
  “Heechul.” Siwon gave his infamous, blindingly white smile. “Beautiful as always.”
  Heechul smiled at Siwon’s compliment. Hankyung glared miserably at his foot. He hated Choi Siwon. He didn’t understand how someone who spent all day checking his hair and smiling like he was God’s Gift to the entire population of SJ High (teachers included) ever made it to his current role as Class President of his class (and incidentally, Hankyung’s class as well). Not only that, in the areas where Hankyung was stuttering Choi Siwon was stunning. Choi Siwon didn’t just talk, he gave speeches, and anybody who was anybody would be straining their ears just to hear his voice – whereas Hankyung, by contrast, often had to be asked to repeat himself quite a few times, just so that his listeners can hear past his accent and stuttering and quiet voice to fully catch his point. With a fantastic body and build, Choi Siwon’s abs were the talk of jealousy among many of the male population in SJ High (teachers included). He was so tall that he towered over a good many of them (meaning that the rest of them poor ones had to look up to him to actually get to talk to him), and his face was so dashingly handsome that it was at the constant attention of fluttering eyelashes from the female population of SJ High (teachers included). Hankyung balled his fist deep within his pants, and after several tries, managed to unclench them. Choi Siwon always had this effect on him.
  “So, who’s on this list?” Choi Siwon said conversationally. Hankyung suddenly felt immensely relieved that he had not yet put his name up, he was sure that Choi Siwon would have found the fact that him, Hankyung, sending a rose to Kim Heechul, was a fact worth remembering till the rest of his life. Hankyung moved to one side to allow Choi Siwon to shoot out a muscled arm for the list. He scanned it for a while and let out a low whistle.
  “Sungmin’s giving every one of his ex-boyfriends a rose,” Siwon said, the edges of his mouth curling upwards. He stepped closer to Heechul, so close that his lips were just brushing the tip of Heechul ear – making Hankyung ball up his fists again – and continued, “And every one of his ex-boyfriends are giving you a rose.” Siwon paused. “So, to whom is Kim Heechul returning the rose to?”
  Hankyung glared resolutely at the floor. He knew what was coming, he knew that Siwon was going to charm Kim Heechul out of his pants and then waltz out of the cafeteria with a new boyfriend in tow; but despite knowing that Hankyung still remained rooted to his spot, waiting for Heechul to make his decision. Deep down, he was still quietly hoping that maybe, maybe, Kim Heechul would give him a rose instead.
  But, said the logical part of him in his head. What are the chances of that ever happening?
  Never, the rest of him answered back. And in that moment Hankyung makes an important, split-second decision.
  He took the list abruptly from Siwon’s muscled fingers and grabbed a pencil from the booth. Writing out the name that had adorned every single page of Hankyung’s math and science textbooks, Hankyung finished his script and threw down the pencil. He fished into his pocket for a wallet, pulled out a ten-dollar note and placed it down on the booth. He reached down, beneath the table, where Junsu kept boxes full of roses and candies. He opened it and pulled out the most beautiful rose among the others. He breathed in the scent of the rose, which help calm him down. His heart pounding, Hankyung stood up, and walked over to where Kim Heechul and Choi Siwon were standing. He pushed himself in between the pair of them, and gently, he tucked the rose into Heechul’s shirt pocket. Heechul looked startled (and Hankyung was pretty sure Siwon looked scandalized) but he couldn’t care less about that now. “For you,” he whispered, in Chinese.
  When Hankyung looks back on this scene in the future it would be full of regrets and cusses towards himself, like why was he so stupid to confess to his crush in front of the whole school, why did he have to do it in a language in which his crush couldn’t understand, and why in front of Choi Siwon, especially, but for the moment, Hankyung cannot care less.
  “Happy Valentines Day,” Hankyung told him, still in Chinese. He smiled at Heechul, no where near as dazzling or as confident as Choi Siwon, but a smile all the same. Their lips were only centimeters apart; up close, Heechul’s face was even more beautiful and heavenly then ever. Still smiling, Hankyung walks away from him, feeling victorious over the small fact that at least, he managed to give his Valentine Day rose to Kim Heechul, never mind the consequences (for now).
  He’s taken five steps away from Heechul and is another five steps to the door when Hankyung heard a fluster of activity behind him. Hankyung is burning with curiosity but he doesn’t want to look - he’s afraid that he’ll just embarrass himself even more, but then came Heechul’s voice, “Hankyung wait!”
  Hankyung stopped moving. Then he turned.
  Heechul was running up towards him, rose in hand, a huge smile plastered onto his face. Mimicking Hankyung’s actions, Heechul took the rose and inserted it gently into Hankyung’s shirt pocket. He smiled, leaned in close to Hankyung, and after staring at his brown eyes for a while, kissed him on the lips.
  Hankyung’s eyes grew big in shock and surprise, but he finally overcame it and started to kiss Heechul back.
  Hankyung doesn’t want to but the both of them do eventually break for breath. Heechul is all smiles, and he whispered to Hankyung, in Chinese (and the air of someone who had practiced this phrase over and over again in front of the mirror), “Thank you. Happy Valentines Day!”
  Heechul kisses him one more time on the lips, and then eyes shining, smile wide and big, he squeezes Hankyung’s hand and takes off from the cafeteria, leaving Hankyung standing there, a big, dopey smile on his face, eyes dreamy, fingers absentmindedly brushing where Heechul’s lips last left him as he thought about how well this years’ Valentines Day turned out.

A/N: Thanks to vanilachocopie for giving me a nudge in this direction... here is your Hanchul Valentine Fic! And I know Heechul's not really very Heechul-ish in this fic, but for further understanding as to why he might be in this state, you can check out this fic, which is related... sort of (anyway it explains how Heechul reacts (or how I think he reacts) to crushes...
Kyaaa... my new bias is out here... HYUKSU!!!
Happy Valentines Day everyone!

[FIC] Pictures of Him in Your Locker
Hankyung & Heechul
title: Pictures of Him in Your Locker
characters/pairings: Heechul/Sungmin, Hanchul and Kyumin (but only if you squint)
genre: School!AU, Romance, Friendship
rating: G

  “Why do you have so many pictures of him in your locker?”
  Heechul freezes. He turns around to see Sungmin standing there, staring at him with a curious expression on his face. “W-What?” he stammers.
  “I said, why do you have so many pictures of him in your locker?” Sungmin repeats, taking a step closer to Heechul so as to view the pictures from a closer angle. It was an innocent gesture, but enough to successfully trap Heechul in between him and the locker, leaving the elder with no way out but to answer Sungmin’s question. Sungmin’s eyes leave the picture of the young dancer on stage and meets Heechul’s brown ones. Sungmin lifts an eyebrow. “Well?”
  Heechul’s heart is beating fast as he stares back into Sungmin’s eyes. He’s stuck, not just physically but mentally as well, because he doesn’t know how to answer Sungmin’s question. He has no idea why he has so many pictures of that one single person taped all over his locker walls, it just feels right and like he should be doing it so he just snaps a photo of him whenever he could and sticks it on any available spot. But of course he couldn’t tell that to Sungmin because even though Sungmin was his best friend some things were best left unexplained; he didn’t want Sungmin to think he was some sort of psychotic stalker who always has a camera handy in his pocket. And yet if he doesn’t say anything soon he would risk looking like an absolute fool in front of Sungmin, and Heechul hates looking like a fool, especially in front of Sungmin. He has to say something but he’s not sure what to say; in the end his mind conjures up a last minute excuse; and Heechul’s mouth opens and he’s ready to say something like ‘For the school article I’m covering’ when Sungmin steps back and holds a hand up, and, rolling his eyes, says “Forget it, its fine.”
  Heechul stares at him with his mouth hanging open while Sungmin continues to step backwards. The younger shrugs at Heechul’s questioning gaze and walks down the hallway, intent on finding someone else to bother, but not before he throws down a parting gift for Heechul: “I gave him your number, by the way.”
  Heechul finally regains control of his mouth and he lets out a spluttered “What?!” as Sungmin’s back disappears off the hallway and he goes off to find Kyuhyun, passing by another person walking in the opposite direction, this one intent on finding Kim Heechul. Sungmin grins, lopes an arm around Cho Kyuhyun’s waist, and leaves his best friend to deal with his issues.


A/N: It's been so long since I last posted... been working on some new, chaptered ones... :) This idea came from the random suju generator


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